Article : being a cart girl is a sexist nightmare

[Deceptively Short]

A good tip for the unreconstructed is “if you don’t know the difference between flirting and sexual harassment then stop flirting!

[Roadking2003]

A good tip for the unreconstructed is “if you don’t know the difference between flirting and sexual harassment then stop flirting!

 

That line is constantly being redrawn. What was flirting 30 years ago is now harassment.

[rsj1360]

There may be numerous reasons the woman worked at the club for four summers. There may not have been much other choice open to her.

 

Instead of putting the blame on a teenager having to put much older men in their places (how many teenagers would be capable of doing that?), how about putting the blame on grown adult men who choose to act innappropriately.

 

Women should not have to "choose" between earning some money and having to put up with being harrassed.

 

I haven't seen anybody blame the cart girl.

Everyone saying she didn't have to work there are blaming her.

[Sawgrass]

A good tip for the unreconstructed is “if you don’t know the difference between flirting and sexual harassment then stop flirting!

 

That line is constantly being redrawn. What was flirting 30 years ago is now harassment.

Are you sure? I'm pretty sure respectful flirting was and is acceptable. In fact, it's probably the only way our species can survive.

[BlackDiamondPar5]

My course solved this problem... They have a heavy set 60 something male named Norm. ?

[mshills]

I doubt anyone who has played much golf in the US hasn't seen something get uncomfortable, weird, or downright inappropriate with a cart girl.

 

Definitely not absolution - but it all comes down to alcohol.

 

I like a cocktail or four as much or more than the next guy, but not during the round. Save the booze for the 19th hole.

And abuse the barmaid?

 

IMO it's not about alcohol, it's about sensitivity. You can get a respectful person drunk without fear of his exhibiting gross sexual behavior.

 

I was obviously not clear.

 

Having booze on the course serves no useful purpose, and this is coming from someone who likes a drink. But when playing a sport? No thanks.

 

Get abusive to a bartender and see how that works out at a local watering hole. Pretty sad to think about needing a bouncer at a golf course. :-(

[DaveGoodrich]

A good tip for the unreconstructed is “if you don’t know the difference between flirting and sexual harassment then stop flirting!

 

That line is constantly being redrawn. What was flirting 30 years ago is now harassment.

 

No, some of it was always really harassment. Women just didn't have the power in society to call it out and be heard.

[Sawgrass]

Pretty sad to think about needing a bouncer at a golf course. :-(

 

You should read some of our pace of play threads!

[Roadking2003]

A good tip for the unreconstructed is “if you don’t know the difference between flirting and sexual harassment then stop flirting!

 

That line is constantly being redrawn. What was flirting 30 years ago is now harassment.

Are you sure? I'm pretty sure respectful flirting was and is acceptable. In fact, it's probably the only way our species can survive.

 

Yes, I'm quite sure. In some schools, for example, asking for a date a second time is harassment.

[Roadking2003]

There may be numerous reasons the woman worked at the club for four summers. There may not have been much other choice open to her.

 

Instead of putting the blame on a teenager having to put much older men in their places (how many teenagers would be capable of doing that?), how about putting the blame on grown adult men who choose to act innappropriately.

 

Women should not have to "choose" between earning some money and having to put up with being harrassed.

 

I haven't seen anybody blame the cart girl.

Everyone saying she didn't have to work there are blaming her.

 

Sorry, I didn't realize that you defined "blaming" that way. If that's how you define "blaming", then yes, I blame her.

[Halebopp]

A good tip for the unreconstructed is “if you don’t know the difference between flirting and sexual harassment then stop flirting!

 

That line is constantly being redrawn. What was flirting 30 years ago is now harassment.

Are you sure? I'm pretty sure respectful flirting was and is acceptable. In fact, it's probably the only way our species can survive.

 

Yes, I'm quite sure. In some schools, for example, asking for a date a second time is harassment.

 

What else could it be? The other person said no once already, let him/her be.

 

Edit: I can't believe they sent the Lexi thread to cooler instead of this one.

[Roadking2003]

 

I was obviously not clear.

 

Having booze on the course serves no useful purpose, and this is coming from someone who likes a drink. But when playing a sport? No thanks.

 

Get abusive to a bartender and see how that works out at a local watering hole. Pretty sad to think about needing a bouncer at a golf course. :-(

 

What ????

 

I rarely drink on the golf course, but drinking serves any useful purpose that somebody chooses it to serve. People should be able to drink on a golf course for any reason whatsoever and for no reason at all. Other people's enjoyment is not for me (or you) to define.

[Roadking2003]

A good tip for the unreconstructed is “if you don’t know the difference between flirting and sexual harassment then stop flirting!

 

That line is constantly being redrawn. What was flirting 30 years ago is now harassment.

Are you sure? I'm pretty sure respectful flirting was and is acceptable. In fact, it's probably the only way our species can survive.

 

Yes, I'm quite sure. In some schools, for example, asking for a date a second time is harassment.

 

What else could it be? The other person said no once already, let him/her be.

 

It's certainly not harassment to ask twice or even five times. Millions of people got married after declining a first request for a date.

[rsj1360]

There may be numerous reasons the woman worked at the club for four summers. There may not have been much other choice open to her.

 

Instead of putting the blame on a teenager having to put much older men in their places (how many teenagers would be capable of doing that?), how about putting the blame on grown adult men who choose to act innappropriately.

 

Women should not have to "choose" between earning some money and having to put up with being harrassed.

 

I haven't seen anybody blame the cart girl.

Everyone saying she didn't have to work there are blaming her.

 

Sorry, I didn't realize that you defined "blaming" that way. If that's how you define "blaming", then yes, I blame her.

Or you could blame the adult men. So, you knoe, she doesn't have to choose between a job she presumably likes, on the one hand, and being harrassed, on the other.

 

A complete and total lack of empathy is a defining characteristic of a certain segment of society.

[Roadking2003]

There may be numerous reasons the woman worked at the club for four summers. There may not have been much other choice open to her.

 

Instead of putting the blame on a teenager having to put much older men in their places (how many teenagers would be capable of doing that?), how about putting the blame on grown adult men who choose to act innappropriately.

 

Women should not have to "choose" between earning some money and having to put up with being harrassed.

 

I haven't seen anybody blame the cart girl.

Everyone saying she didn't have to work there are blaming her.

 

Sorry, I didn't realize that you defined "blaming" that way. If that's how you define "blaming", then yes, I blame her.

Or you could blame the adult men. So, you knoe, she doesn't have to choose between a job she presumably likes, on the one hand, and being harrassed, on the other.

 

A complete and total lack of empathy is a defining characteristic of a certain segment of society.

 

I've never met anyone with "A complete and total lack of empathy". I certainly wouldn't want to be around them much.

 

The defining characteristic of another segment of our society is always blaming others for their problems and not accepting responsibility for their decisions.

[bthomps33]

A good tip for the unreconstructed is “if you don’t know the difference between flirting and sexual harassment then stop flirting!

 

That's bad advice. It should read, “if you don’t know what the other person thinks is the difference between flirting and sexual harassment then stop flirting!"

 

It doesn't matter what you think is flirting or not if the other person considers it harassment. Giving any kind of complement on looks or even looking at someone can be construed as sexual harassment now.

[Halebopp]

Yes, I'm quite sure. In some schools, for example, asking for a date a second time is harassment.

 

What else could it be? The other person said no once already, let him/her be.

 

It's certainly not harassment to ask twice or even five times. Millions of people got married after declining a first request for a date.

 

I'm sorry but that's harassment. The other person has made it clear she is not interested in you and doesn't want any more approaches. Any move after that means you're not taking no for an answer. You're harassing her and showing you don't respect her, her decision nor her right to make that decision. If she changes her mind, she has every opportunity to approach you.

[rsj1360]

I've never met anyone with "A complete and total lack of empathy". I certainly wouldn't want to be around them much.

 

The defining characteristic of another segment of our society is always blaming others for their problems and not accepting responsibility for their decisions.

A choice between leaving a job you want vs staying and dealing with harrassment is not a choice.

 

You may want to work on that empathy thing. I see a complete and total lack of it.

[rsj1360]

 

I've never met anyone with "A complete and total lack of empathy". I certainly wouldn't want to be around them much.

 

The defining characteristic of another segment of our society is always blaming others for their problems and not accepting responsibility for their decisions.

The decision here is for adult men to not harrass a teenage woman because she wants a job.

 

Where is it her responibility to take for her decisions? She wanted a job. Bad decision. Must be punished.

 

How you turn this around to be the fault of a young woman wanting s job free of harrassment rather than the fault of grown men failing to control themselves is beyond me.

 

Complete and total lack of empathy.

[ratspros]

Yes, I'm quite sure. In some schools, for example, asking for a date a second time is harassment.

 

What else could it be? The other person said no once already, let him/her be.

 

It's certainly not harassment to ask twice or even five times. Millions of people got married after declining a first request for a date.

 

I'm sorry but that's harassment. The other person has made it clear she is not interested in you and doesn't want any more approaches. Any move after that means you're not taking no for an answer. You're harassing her and showing you don't respect her, her decision nor her right to make that decision. If she changes her mind, she has every opportunity to approach you.

 

Man I better charge my wife with sexual harassment. I didn't agree to date her until the 15th+ time she hit on me. I made it very clear I just thought of her as just friends, but she kept showing up at places I was at with drinks and low cut tops flirting with me.

 

Little did I know that instead of locking her down I should've locked her up.

[Carl Spackler3]

That job is right up there with a Hooters waitress on my daughters list of "jobs I don't want" .

exactly the girls with cute bodies and friendly attitudes don’t complain about making more tips than Gus the “80 yr old hair growing out of his ears” starter

[Deceptively Short]

With no offence mate, if some random woman kept on turning up where I was, provocatively dressed or not, asking me to ‘go out’ with them 14 times in a row, despite me having said I wasn’t interested at least 14 times, I would define this as harassment.

If somebody did this to you now, happily married or not, it sounds like a case for some sort of restraining order doesn’t it?

[deadsolid...shank]

Yes, I'm quite sure. In some schools, for example, asking for a date a second time is harassment.

 

What else could it be? The other person said no once already, let him/her be.

 

It's certainly not harassment to ask twice or even five times. Millions of people got married after declining a first request for a date.

 

I'm sorry but that's harassment. The other person has made it clear she is not interested in you and doesn't want any more approaches. Any move after that means you're not taking no for an answer. You're harassing her and showing you don't respect her, her decision nor her right to make that decision. If she changes her mind, she has every opportunity to approach you.

 

Man I better charge my wife with sexual harassment. I didn't agree to date her until the 15th+ time she hit on me. I made it very clear I just thought of her as just friends, but she kept showing up at places I was at with drinks and low cut tops flirting with me.

 

Little did I know that instead of locking her down I should've locked her up.

 

It’s not going to be too long and breathing is going to be offensive and upset somebody.

 

I am sooooooo glad I’m not growing up in these times, and even happier that my kids aren’t. My God, asking for a date more than once is harassment......that just so....I don’t even have a word to describe it.

[ratspros]

 

What else could it be? The other person said no once already, let him/her be.

 

It's certainly not harassment to ask twice or even five times. Millions of people got married after declining a first request for a date.

 

I'm sorry but that's harassment. The other person has made it clear she is not interested in you and doesn't want any more approaches. Any move after that means you're not taking no for an answer. You're harassing her and showing you don't respect her, her decision nor her right to make that decision. If she changes her mind, she has every opportunity to approach you.

 

Man I better charge my wife with sexual harassment. I didn't agree to date her until the 15th+ time she hit on me. I made it very clear I just thought of her as just friends, but she kept showing up at places I was at with drinks and low cut tops flirting with me.

 

Little did I know that instead of locking her down I should've locked her up.

 

It’s not going to be too long and breathing is going to be offensive and upset somebody.

 

I am sooooooo glad I’m not growing up in these times, and even happier that my kids aren’t. My God, asking for a date more than once is harassment......that just so....I don’t even have a word to describe it.

 

Unfortunately I have 6 and 4 year old daughters. And I have to explain to them what actually is sexual harassment and what our media and celebrities would like you to believe is sexual harassment. Bunch of victims people are raising and it doesn't sit well with me.

[deadsolid...shank]

I have a good friend who was one of the country’s most successful college women’s basketball coaches. He had gotten to the point that he wouldn’t even high five the girls when they came off the court. Would not meet with them, even in multiples, in his office.

 

One problem with this issue, and it’s such a touchy one because if true, it’s such a bad one, is that there is no “innocent until proven guilty” on this one. One accusation and people are ready with the hangman’s noose. As a country we’ve lost a “middle ground”. Everything is an extreme.

[Carl Spackler3]

I have a good friend who was one of the country’s most successful college women’s basketball coaches. He had gotten to the point that he wouldn’t even high five the girls when they came off the court. Would not meet with them, even in multiples, in his office.

 

One problem with this issue, and it’s such a touchy one because if true, it’s such a bad one, is that there is no “innocent until proven guilty” on this one. One accusation and people are ready with the hangman’s noose. As a country we’ve lost a “middle ground”. Everything is an extreme.

i was a police supervisor for 17 yrs. I NEVER had a female officer in a meeting or office with me without a witness or a recording device. Ever.. you think the cart girls flirty ? try a 22 yr old female cop that doesn’t want a foot post in the projects

[ratspros]

With no offence mate, if some random woman kept on turning up where I was, provocatively dressed or not, asking me to ‘go out’ with them 14 times in a row, despite me having said I wasn’t interested at least 14 times, I would define this as harassment.

If somebody did this to you now, happily married or not, it sounds like a case for some sort of restraining order doesn’t it?

 

Nah sounds like a girl who knows how awesome I am and how much one should work to land such a guy. Kidding kidding.

 

Your statement says it all though. At most, even today this should be viewed as a minor inconvenience having to turn someone down, not a legitimate reason for a restraining order.

 

I'm now in real estate, every now and then I deal with what I'll call a single and very experienced older lady. Almost 100% of the time with these ladies they give me the old "there's got to be something I can do for you that will help me get the house for a bit less". Should I have all these potential clients charged and not allowed with in 100m of my listings? No, Deal with it like an adult and move on.

 

Cart girl chose her profession, cart girl should accept the flirting that comes with it. Anything that crosses the line then she can slap the douchebag or report it to a manager.

 

When I was a bartender in my younger days you wouldn't believe what some of the girls/women would say or do to me. But I knew that came with that service industry. I could accept it and do my job and accept the tips I got, or go to a job in a different environment.

 

I mean can a stripper claim harassment for some guy throwing a single on the dance floor at her? At some point people have to accept the positions they've chosen and the attention that comes with it.

[Roadking2003]

I've never met anyone with "A complete and total lack of empathy". I certainly wouldn't want to be around them much.

 

The defining characteristic of another segment of our society is always blaming others for their problems and not accepting responsibility for their decisions.

The decision here is for adult men to not harrass a teenage woman because she wants a job.

 

Where is it her responibility to take for her decisions? She wanted a job. Bad decision. Must be punished.

 

How you turn this around to be the fault of a young woman wanting s job free of harrassment rather than the fault of grown men failing to control themselves is beyond me.

 

Complete and total lack of empathy.

 

The woman decided to work there four years. That's no accident. That's her choice. No, she shouldn't be punished. But her complaints are baseless if she chooses to keep working there. There are thousands and thousands of jobs in this country that don't require a woman to wear short skirts or tights and drive around to be leered at by men. She CHOSE to work in that environment. By CHOOSING to return year after year she forfeits her right to complain.

 

Complete and total lack of intelligence.

[Roadking2003]

With no offence mate, if some random woman kept on turning up where I was, provocatively dressed or not, asking me to ‘go out’ with them 14 times in a row, despite me having said I wasn’t interested at least 14 times, I would define this as harassment.

If somebody did this to you now, happily married or not, it sounds like a case for some sort of restraining order doesn’t it?

 

Who was talking about a "random woman"?

[Roadking2003]

With no offence mate, if some random woman kept on turning up where I was, provocatively dressed or not, asking me to ‘go out’ with them 14 times in a row, despite me having said I wasn’t interested at least 14 times, I would define this as harassment.

If somebody did this to you now, happily married or not, it sounds like a case for some sort of restraining order doesn’t it?

 

Nah sounds like a girl who knows how awesome I am and how much one should work to land such a guy. Kidding kidding.

 

Your statement says it all though. At most, even today this should be viewed as a minor inconvenience having to turn someone down, not a legitimate reason for a restraining order.

 

I'm now in real estate, every now and then I deal with what I'll call a single and very experienced older lady. Almost 100% of the time with these ladies they give me the old "there's got to be something I can do for you that will help me get the house for a bit less". Should I have all these potential clients charged and not allowed with in 100m of my listings? No, Deal with it like an adult and move on.

 

Cart girl chose her profession, cart girl should accept the flirting that comes with it. Anything that crosses the line then she can slap the douchebag or report it to a manager.

 

When I was a bartender in my younger days you wouldn't believe what some of the girls/women would say or do to me. But I knew that came with that service industry. I could accept it and do my job and accept the tips I got, or go to a job in a different environment.

 

I mean can a stripper claim harassment for some guy throwing a single on the dance floor at her? At some point people have to accept the positions they've chosen and the attention that comes with it.

 

Spot on!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

It's like a guy joins the army, reups three times and then complains about army food or fighting a war.