Most ridiculous thing heard on the range

[goaliescott]

Divine intervention?

Two years ago my son and I were on the range. He's improving and very laid-back, just enjoying hitting some good ones and some not so good ones.

A range "expert" starting yakking at him about changing his grip, practically wrapping his hands around the club very awkwardly before my son said "I'm good, my dad is helping me out."

The guy harrumphed a bit and stepped back, continuing to dispense ignored advise.

Just then a dust devil whipped through, pickup up one of the heavy range mats, and flattened the guy.

We both pulled the mat off of him and helped him up, "hmmpphh! that's what I get for trying to help a hacker!"

He stormed off and my son just said "what a clown show" before setting up for another shot.

If he hadn't been trying to coach us, the mat would have just flopped harmlessly to the ground.

 

 

[billh17]

Guy next to my place was hitting some nice shots, and a few every now and then not so nice.

A range "know it all" came up and started to give him unwanted advice. After a couple more words of wisdom,the guy finally turns around to the idiot, and never said a word. Gave him the best Ray Floyd look i have ever seen . Never said a word, just stared at him. The rangewarrior walked away and we never saw him again that session.

[mukster]

Not heard, but seen. Probably only ridiculous to me, but I have watched a guy twice at the range now, practicing. He consciously practices taking the club back to the inside on his backswing and then hits either blocks or snap hooks. The practice move before hitting the ball is whipping the club inside. He was there for over an hour each time. No change in the outcome.

[Kridian]

> @mukster said: No change in the outcome.

You should've saved him from the anguish and told him the _deally-o._

 

 

[Clambake]

Had a guy in the stall next to me with one of the odder swing quirks I’ve seen. The back swing wasn’t bad and he’d get the club to almost parallel at the top, but on his forward swing he’d stop his body turn at impact and stop his hands before they would come back to waist high after impact. His hands never came it higher than thigh level after impact, like there was a tree in front of him that he was avoiding. It was like a full back swing and then throw the brakes on at impact. I thought maybe he had a physical impairment, but then he told his buddy on the other side “Your swing is too long - you need to shorten it up or you won’t have any control. Do it like this” and shows his friend how to have almost zero forward swing after impact. Hasn’t he ever seen any pro or good golfer with a full move through the ball?

[Ferguson]

I was at a small scramble tourney last fall standing with a few guys near people hitting balls on the range. We were about 15 feet from the tournament director. She was trying to get the attention of everyone. One of the guys in my foursome (Tim) has the best sense of humor. He is downright hilarious and the only reason I played in this event.

 

A guy with a foreign accent walks up to the director with microphone and asks to see the "GOLF ROSTER." She turns on the mic and starts paging "GOFF FROSTER." My buddy Tim walks up and says, "I'm Goff Froster, how can I help you?" She turns to the foreign accent guy and says, "this gentleman asked for you." He turns to the guy and says, "I'm Goff Froster, how can I help you?" The foreign accent guy was puzzled. This goes back and forth for a few minutes. I couldn't breathe I was laughing so hard.

[Birdie Mac]

> @Ferguson said:

> I was at a small scramble tourney last fall standing with a few guys near people hitting balls on the range. We were about 15 feet from the tournament director. She was trying to get the attention of everyone. One of the guys in my foursome (Tim) has the best sense of humor. He is downright hilarious and the only reason I played in this event.

>

> A guy with a foreign accent walks up to the director with microphone and asks to see the "GOLF ROSTER." She turns on the mic and starts paging "GOFF FROSTER." My buddy Tim walks up and says, "I'm Goff Froster, how can I help you?" She turns to the foreign accent guy and says, "this gentleman asked for you." He turns to the guy and says, "I'm Goff Froster, how can I help you?" The foreign accent guy was puzzled. This goes back and forth for a few minutes. I couldn't breathe I was laughing so hard.

Classic. Your buddy Tim is now also my buddy.

 

 

[Anser]

> @seifer248 said:

> Was at my local top golf and two rather good looking ladies walk in with golf clubs in hand and high heels on. Proceed to hit great shots wearing the heels until one hits a 400mph worm burner and shouts at the top of her voice "And thats how i F***ing roll!!!". Awesome!

 

assuming you wifed her?

[Weeze]

My dad would accomplish a shank/double-hit situation, and he'd always say "toe'd it off the heel". Any time either of us hit a bad shot now we just say we toe'd it off the heel.

[BB28403]

A big football guy yelling at a guy

“Hockey season starts in 364 days!”

[BB28403]

> @Anser said:

> > @seifer248 said:

> > Was at my local top golf and two rather good looking ladies walk in with golf clubs in hand and high heels on. Proceed to hit great shots wearing the heels until one hits a 400mph worm burner and shouts at the top of her voice "And thats how i F***ing roll!!!". Awesome!

>

> assuming you wifed her?

 

Instagram golf girls ... yeah they look good but geez they make me want to puke .

 

[Anser]

> @BB28403 said:

> > @Anser said:

> > > @seifer248 said:

> > > Was at my local top golf and two rather good looking ladies walk in with golf clubs in hand and high heels on. Proceed to hit great shots wearing the heels until one hits a 400mph worm burner and shouts at the top of her voice "And thats how i F***ing roll!!!". Awesome!

> >

> > assuming you wifed her?

>

> Instagram golf girls ... yeah they look good but geez they make me want to puke .

>

 

You had me at look good :)

[Reasonability]

Maybe not quite in the ridiculous category, but perhaps leaning that way...

 

1. The foot-stomping, club-throwing, shaft-snapping temper tantrum range-baller. Makes you wonder what it might look like with a scorecard in his pocket. And, if caffeine might need to leave his diet - maybe.

 

2. The drive-by horn honker who yells "Fore". No biggie. Knock-knock jokes are lost on me, too. Goes in one ear and out of the other. Seems to bug the shaft-snapper, LOL. But he's about to stroke-out anyway.

 

3. Again not so ridiculous but somewhat fun to watch HOW folks handle it... There's the occasional SNAP where the shaft breaks at the hosel. Clubhead might sail farther than the ball. It's the aftermath that gets interesting. Some ask everyone to hold-up followed by a mad dash to go retrieve it. Some just reach for another stick as tho it didn't happen, finish-up, and leave it there. Some laugh, some turn bright red.

 

Heaven forbid the day comes when an angry club-thrower loses one due to hosel break the instant a horn-honker drives by. Note to self: Brush up on CPR training.

[Hawkeye77]

On CBS the past few days it was “lag” and “ground forces”.

[flaghunting1987]

Not heard, but seen...bid roided out dude was hitting balls and struggling big time...every bad swing at the follow through he'd let the club go behind him. It would fly back 10 feet and an innocent person was walking and got nailed. I finally moved down to the other end of the range.

[Aaronwilson_95]

Watched someone take a back swing and miss their clubs completely , while the managed to hit their entire bag of club on the down swing...

[capnstabn]

> @boxerjoe2011 said:

> I once heard a wife tell her husband something pornographic thinking people were out of earshot. I was not. Haha. It was spectacular.

>

>

>

> On another instance, I got to the range early in the morning, went to the end of the range thinking I would be by myself and let out a thunderous ****. Then went about my business of selecting a wedge and stretching. I turn around and realize there was a middle aged woman two stalls down. There is no way she didn't hear it. So embarrassed.

 

That is like every guy over the age of 65 at my club, except the part about actually being embarrassed.

[RuffingIt]

> @Aaronwilson_95 said:

> Watched someone take a back swing and miss their clubs completely , while the managed to hit their entire bag of club on the down swing...

 

why was the goal to hit the golf bag in the first place? mad?

[Aaronwilson_95]

No, the downswing was that far out of position that he clipped all of his clubs with his driver in hand while trying to make contact .

[J-Blade]

> @billh17 said:

> Guy next to my place was hitting some nice shots, and a few every now and then not so nice.

> A range "know it all" came up and started to give him unwanted advice. After a couple more words of wisdom,the guy finally turns around to the idiot, and never said a word. Gave him the best Ray Floyd look i have ever seen . Never said a word, just stared at him. The rangewarrior walked away and we never saw him again that session.

 

Great!

I was on the receiving end of a Ray Floyd look once at a Champions Tour stop. He was on his way to the first tee and some idiot standing next to me tried to be funny and get Floyd to laugh. It didn't work, and evidently, he thought I made the dumb comment or that I was with the guy who did. "Icy" does not describe it adequately. :)

[Birdie Mac]

> @J-Blade said:

> > @billh17 said:

> > Guy next to my place was hitting some nice shots, and a few every now and then not so nice.

> > A range "know it all" came up and started to give him unwanted advice. After a couple more words of wisdom,the guy finally turns around to the idiot, and never said a word. Gave him the best Ray Floyd look i have ever seen . Never said a word, just stared at him. The rangewarrior walked away and we never saw him again that session.

>

> Great!

> I was on the receiving end of a Ray Floyd look once at a Champions Tour stop. He was on his way to the first tee and some idiot standing next to me tried to be funny and get Floyd to laugh. It didn't work, and evidently, he thought I made the dumb comment or that I was with the guy who did. "Icy" does not describe it adequately. :)

Yikes. I get those from my wife from time to time. :/

 

[J-Blade]

> @"Birdie Mac" said:

> > @J-Blade said:

> > > @billh17 said:

> > > Guy next to my place was hitting some nice shots, and a few every now and then not so nice.

> > > A range "know it all" came up and started to give him unwanted advice. After a couple more words of wisdom,the guy finally turns around to the idiot, and never said a word. Gave him the best Ray Floyd look i have ever seen . Never said a word, just stared at him. The rangewarrior walked away and we never saw him again that session.

> >

> > Great!

> > I was on the receiving end of a Ray Floyd look once at a Champions Tour stop. He was on his way to the first tee and some idiot standing next to me tried to be funny and get Floyd to laugh. It didn't work, and evidently, he thought I made the dumb comment or that I was with the guy who did. "Icy" does not describe it adequately. :)

> Yikes. I get those from my wife from time to time. :/

>

 

I hear ya.. I get those too from my wife... And, like with Ray Floyd, it is always, "What'd I do?" :)

[sixfootnick]

I watched a guy tee it up 20 yards behind me and a couple other guys on the grass line. I guess he preferred mats and thought he was going to hit a whole bucket over our heads.

[vtpachyderm]

Warming up on the range before a scoring round, and not hitting it well - no consistency whatsoever. I hear a voice say 'It's different on the grass, slow your swing down and you'll be fine'. Already a bit pissed off, and look around at which one of my mates said that and notice I'm the only one on the range. Realise it was me dispensing advice to myself...the round did not go so well. :lol:

Norway is the best place for range practice - they are so scared of talking to strangers in general, that you are left alone.

[Loki]

> @vtpachyderm said:

> Warming up on the range before a scoring round, and not hitting it well - no consistency whatsoever. I hear a voice say 'It's different on the grass, slow your swing down and you'll be fine'. Already a bit pissed off, and look around at which one of my mates said that and notice I'm the only one on the range. Realise it was me dispensing advice to myself...the round did not go so well. :lol:

> **Norway is the best place for range practice - they are so scared of talking to strangers in general, that you are left alone.**

 

Hey, now. They are reserved, not scared to talk to strangers. LOL.

[shakey]

Had a whole twenty mins of comedy gold at the range last night. First...let me describe my range for a moment. There’s a 250 marker surrounded by trees. Roughly five paces past the trees is a 10 ft high dirt bank on which sits a 30 ft high fence. From the covered mats it’s only about 238 yds to the 250 marker due to the angle.

Two guys arrive and start hitting off the mats probably twenty paces from where I’m hitting in the Fitting Center. I don’t notice much until I hear “Look at that one fly!” screamed across the range.

“That’s in the mother f’n trees baby” and “300 yds carry all day” quickly follow. I’m at their backs so I have to start watching the action. One guy is holding a phone and apparently they have a third guy on FaceTime or Skype or something. He begins arguing with the guy hitting. “Watch this...I’m putting this (expletive) in those trees over the net!” Hits ball: “That’s 370 over those trees. Did you see that?” He’s yelling at the guy on the phone. “That’s 370 all damn day. 370 carry all f’n day!” It goes on for another few mins. He pops one up and it lands beside the 200 marker and he goes into how far it went. Dude on the phone starts heckling him laughing at his monster carry. The guy hitting gets mad and tells guy number 2 to hang up the phone. The next few mins are complaints about how he can’t get his tee height correct. Then he hits a good one and it’s “That only went 300 cause of these crappy range balls. A real ball would have been 350 plus!”

It got to the point where I couldn’t hit I was laughing so much. I wish I had recorded some of it. In slight defense..he did hit some drives into the net...maybe a 250 carry from where he was hitting.

[rainkingjr]

A few days ago, I heard a guy talking to a young lady about club technology. He said, "In the past, club manufacturers would say you'll gain x amount of yards if you buy our clubs. It was all a bunch of crap then, but not nowadays. Today if you buy a new driver, you actually do gain up to 30 or 40 yards. It's amazing." Big time Kool-aid drinker.

[BB28403]

> @sixfootnick said:

> I watched a guy tee it up 20 yards behind me and a couple other guys on the grass line. I guess he preferred mats and thought he was going to hit a whole bucket over our heads.

 

That is so not cool. If he shanks one , could be at your head.

[DFG]

Was at the range today. A mom and daughter (Clearly beginners or casual "here for fun" types, nothing wrong with that) were whacking balls next to me. I had my headphones in and didn't pay them much attention. At one point, I turned around to switch clubs and the mom made eye contact with me. She asked "You're not using your driver right now, are you?". The daughter quickly said "Mom, stop!". I pretended I didn't hear her but I interpreted that she was interested in trying my driver out. Not really sure where people get the idea that it's okay to use random stranger's things. I'm also left handed and they were right handed, so I'm not sure what they could have done with the club. I should have said "Yes, if you give me a $250 deposit"

[jut111]

> @DFG said:

> Was at the range today. A mom and daughter (Clearly beginners or casual "here for fun" types, nothing wrong with that) were whacking balls next to me. I had my headphones in and didn't pay them much attention. At one point, I turned around to switch clubs and the mom made eye contact with me. She asked "You're not using your driver right now, are you?". The daughter quickly said "Mom, stop!". I pretended I didn't hear her but I interpreted that she was interested in trying my driver out. Not really sure where people get the idea that it's okay to use random stranger's things. I'm also left handed and they were right handed, so I'm not sure what they could have done with the club. I should have said "Yes, if you give me a $250 deposit"

 

Maybe she was hitting on you.